angry-woman

I need to get this off my chest because it’s been something that’s been irritating the heck out of me for so very long.
Can we just stop giving accolade and acceptance to negative and obscene people?

Working in the digital world and being very active on social media, you can say I live and breathe social.
I don’t miss a thing.
Especially when everything is put out there publicly these days.
Including what you’re having for lunch (guilty) or that you found some bump on the back of your ears and you’re wondering what it is (okay…?)
Some things are better left unsaid, folks.
But still, I will take those any day over the “Nasty and Negative Nellie’s”.

When my timelines are constantly flooded with trolls and their army of ogres, I start to wonder how on earth these people have such a huge following and even worse, why they even get support for all their nasty, rant-y comments.
It’s either there are a whole lot of people that are unhappy with their lives and enjoy feeding off one another or there are a whole tons of people that enjoy watching destruction for their own odd pleasures.
I like to call it destruction because that’s basically what they do.
They live their lives trying to annihilate everything in their path in hopes it will make them feel better.
If that means constantly berating everything from brands to celebrities to bloggers to that mother at her child’s softball game that seems to always have her sh*it together, she’ll do it. And often.
Drama is like her oxygen.
She’s also what I call an “energy vampire”.  She sucks the good energy out of those around her and can smell it a mile away.

I’m not saying I’m perfect.
I have called out a few things publicly, most mostly because I wasn’t able to get the closure I needed to rectify any of my “issues” in private.
Or because I was just having a crappy day and felt like getting something off my chest. I’m human.
I can be callously sarcastic sometimes, but that’s just my dry humour and I am always careful about offending someone.
But if you’re the type of person that has to constantly have something negative to say about everything, and often, in a belligerent manner, I think it’s time you take a seat, turn off your smartphone and start re-evaluating your life before you cause any further damage.
Fix whatever issues you need to work on for yourself and learn to know when things are just better left unsaid.

We all have our own problems and we all don’t agree with many things, but that doesn’t give us the right to be nasty because someone doesn’t fit into our standards.
And reality check: You’re not always right.  This is something I am also still learning myself.  Hey, I’m the eldest child… it’s ingrained in my overall being. 😉

What makes me shake my head too is when women like this proudly display and boast about being a Feminist.
Do you even know what that means?

feminist
[fem-uh-nist]

adjective, Sometimes, feministic
1. advocating social, political, legal, and economic rights for women equal to those of men.

noun
2. an advocate of such rights.

How can one be a so-called Feminist when they are often antagonistic towards other women and their personal choices?  
Hmmm… something to think about.

It’s not always easy, I know, but women… can we just put our pride aside for once and learn to support one another?  Even if we don’t agree with something, learn when is an appropriate time to speak and more importantly, when NOT to. 

20 comments on “Stop Enabling Negative & Nasty Nellie’s”

  1. Well said! People are so destructive these days, especially when they think they can hide behind a screen. Whenever I’m about to post something negative, I pause and think and let some time pass before deciding it’s best left unsaid and move on.

    • Exactly. I am the same way. We are only human and as women, we really do feel emotions and very strongly at certain points.
      It’s only in our nature to want to blurt out how we feel to relieve that frustration.
      But yes, taste the words first and pick your battles — that’s what I say to myself nowadays.
      Sometimes we can make something even bigger of an issue and perhaps even burn bridges with others just because of one moment of anger.
      Thanks for reading, Melinda!

  2. The hardest part about this Negative Nellie situation is not actually Negative Nelly.
    It’s the “encouraging” from others. She rants about her children. She complains about them being brats and all the awful things they did that day and how she yelled at them.
    And then all the comments say what a good mother she is. STOP! Yelling and complaining about your children does not you a good mother make. She might be a good mother, but that’s not the good parts.

    That’s pretty much what you said already, “Accolade and acceptance”.
    I think you hit the nail on the head.

  3. Oh, I am so with you on this one! I have had to eliminate people from my life because of their negativity. I can’t understand – it takes way more energy to be negative.

    • It totally does. Attitude and energy is so contagious and it affects everyone else around you. I’d rather be spreading more goodness than bad – after all, we don’t know what anybody else around is going through.

  4. Trolls irritate the hell out of me but they are everywhere now so if I get a tweet from someone nasty, I don’t respond and I just block them. They can bite me!

  5. Reading this post was definitely a cause for pause. Thanks for giving me a chance to reflect on my own life.

  6. Yet, on another note, how many times do you hear people say, “I’m great” or “I really enjoyed my weekend”, when asked how they are? We seem to be in a competition for the most tired, most overrun with activities, most strapped for money…

  7. Oh yes. I have seen and come across plenty of Negative Nellies in my day. One of which works with me.
    I am always awaiting her negative reply to something I talk to her about, whatever the topic may be.
    After my daughter was born, I was talking to my coworkers about how I thought I was suffering from post-partum blues because of my inability to breastfeed and instead of being sensitive to my feelings, she attacked me about stopping and that I should have kept going, that it would have made me better mentally. REALLY?!
    I couldn’t stop crying after that. It was horrible. She was told off by a few for sure but I just don’t understand how some woman can be so rude? I can imagine how it is online because they have a screen to hide behind. I agree with you. They need to stop being supported and by support that can also mean even just following or engaging with them.

    • I’m so sorry to hear that. That’s HORRIBLE and extremely insensitive of her.
      I honestly do feel bad for them because they are clearly fighting some personal demons to be the way they are, but they’re like dark clouds. When they’re gone, you just feel so much better.

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